I travel with my husband a lot. In fact, he's my favorite travel buddy. We've hiked to hidden waterfalls in Hawaii, swam with stingrays in Grand Cayman, and rode horseback through the ocean in Turks and Caicos. We're already planning and dreaming about where we'll head to for our next big vacation. But I also love exploring without him - and I think he would say the same thing. And the best part? It makes our marriage stronger.
I'm a firm believer that absence makes the heart grow fonder and that's why ever since we graduated college we've made it a priority to go on a trip (or two) with our friends each year. In May I'm heading to Charleston with my college roomies for a weekend full of sipping wine, soaking up the sun in our bikinis, and laughing until we cry. And as I write this my hubby is in Atlanta on a beer drinking, golf marathon trip with his buddies. But guess what? I can't wait for him to come home. So today I'm sharing five reasons why I travel without my husband and why I think all couples should too!
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#1) It Gives Us Time to Miss Each Other
When you're married and spend most every day together no matter how crazy in love you are, let's face it, it's easy to fall into a routine. While I'm a firm believer in dating your spouse and being intentional about spending time together - we've found one of the best ways to give our marriage a little spark is by spending time apart. When my hubby is away it gives me time to miss him. When he's not here every day when I get home from work it makes me realize what a large part of my life he is. And when we do get back home from a trip, not only are we happier from having experienced something new, it's so fun being able to catch up and share those memories and adventures with each other.
#2) It's Important to Have Interests Outside of One Another
During our premarital counseling, one of the big takeaways was the importance of having interests outside of your spouse. Your entire existence shouldn't be consumed by another person. Having separate hobbies or pastimes apart from your loved one makes you a more well-rounded person. Not only is this a great motto to live by, it comes into play most often when we're traveling. He would rather spend all day on the golf course or watching sports while drinking a cold beer - and that's totally fine! I love all things Disney and shopping and going out dancing. While I do think it's important to compromise on certain things and show an interest in your spouse's passions, it's also nice to not be confined by them. When I travel with my sister or my college gals we're free to do things that make us happy (and take all the photos we want) without having to worry about what our men are thinking or whether they are having a good time. In addition to our differences, my husband and I also share a lot of hobbies and interests which makes our trips together so much fun when we're able to experience those things with each other or learn a new skill together.
#3) I'm Not Restricted by His Likes or Dislikes
Along the lines of different interests, we also have things that we like or dislike while traveling. My husband hates crowds and I don't ever think I could convince him to step foot at Disney World. It's my dream to go back. I'm obsessed with hunting for the best wall murals - he doesn't get all the hype. I love window shopping and exploring small towns and he thinks they all look the same. Okay - you get the point. When I travel with my gals I'm able to pack my itinerary full of all the things that bring my heart joy which he may not necessarily enjoy. And he does the same on his trips - although I'm not entirely sure I want to know what happens with four guys sharing a hotel room (I imagine it doesn't smell great). The times we do travel we are able to focus our time on the things we both enjoy like hiking or trying out new restaurants.
#4) Your Significant Other Shouldn't Be the Only Relationship You're Intentional About
While my marriage is, and always will be, the most important one in my life, it's not the only one. My friends from college live all over the country now and it's not as easy to connect as it was when we lived one floor above each other and could all meet in the living room for a movie night. We all know that life gets busy but my favorite part of our annual trips is that we pick up right where we left off no matter how long it's been. By making these trips a priority in our lives I am able to maintain friendships outside of our marriage that build me up and refresh my soul - which in turn makes a better wife.
#5) We Have a Secure and Trusting Relationship
This is a huge aspect when traveling without your significant other. And trust me, you won't get the same fulfillment from a girls (or guys) trip if you feel the need to constantly be checking in with your spouse or letting them know your every move. In fact, when my hubby and I are away we hardly talk at all. Of course we check in once or twice throughout the day to see how things are going or that we made it to our destination safely and we always make a point to chat before we go to bed, but for the most part we let the other person do their thing and enjoy their time away. When I'm the one traveling this helps me to be more intentional with those I'm with and not have to worry about constantly checking my phone. And even when I'm the one at home while he's away having all the fun, I enjoy the alone time. I get to do things on my own terms, monopolize the remote, and I don't have to cook (hello cereal for dinner!).
Another big aspect of trust when it comes to traveling is ensuring you are upfront when planning. Before we book a trip with our friends we make sure to discuss when and how long we'll be away and that it aligns with both our lives. Right now we don't have any children or pets (that will change soon) but if you do, this factor is even more crucial. We also talk about budgets and how much is realistic for the other person to be spending on their adventures.
Do you enjoy traveling without your spouse? I would love to hear your perspective on these types of trips.
I love creating detailed travel guides to ensure you get the most out of your time. On this blog I'll be sharing some of my past trips in hopes that it helps you plan your next adventure. Pack your suitcase you never know where I'll be heading next!
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